Mr. Z Takes Umbrage

January 26th, 2008
Subject: Infringement of my Intellectual Property Rights

Mr. Wakcher:

Before I assert that you have clearly infringed upon my intellectual property rights and have most graciously blessed me with yet another cause of action against you and your obscene webcomic, I must first state that I am not in receipt of a response to my previous complaint. I warn you that this will heavily influence my decision to pursue legal action. Already, my armies of legal counselors are gathering to put an end to this distasteful display of geometric insipidness.

I point out in my previous complaint that I made superb use of the word "umbrage." I quote:

"I have been following the developments of your new website and noted on 1/19/2008 what can be none other then an indirect affront to me and my fellow mathematicians to which I take umbrage."

You can imagine my surprise when I saw this word was reused unimaginatively in your most recent web comic dating 1/25/2008.

In addition to my abundant mathematical prowess, I am a lifetime member of the International Council of Philology. As a philologist of some note, it is my contention that your use of this word was not coincidental and was provably inspired by my prior complaint.

The word umbrage is not a word that can just be bandied about with little care. It comes from the Latin root "umbraticum" meaning "from shade" and as I am sure you are conspicuously unaware, umbraticum has the word "umbrella" as a notable derivative. The concept of umbrage in the sense of taking offense must be carefully considered. In the 14th century "umbrage" exclusively referred to shade, however, in the 17th century the word began to be used figuratively and the original meaning carefully distorted with immense literary care. Unfortunately, your usage of the word in such poor context results is nothing more than uninspired self-mockery.

It is my intention to assert my full legal rights and smite your petty circle, square, and now triangle with mighty words, and an even mightier cadre of lawyers.


Mr. Z